Search and destroy

Easton Pearson Sea urchin printed cotton dress available from net a porter

Easton Pearson Sea urchin printed cotton dress available from net a porter

Somehow I have ended up as my mother’s official style adviser. This isn’t anything particularly arduous but involves approving anything that she buys and periodically going shopping with her.  Luckily we get on pretty well so these trips aren’t exactly arduous.

The only time where problems arise when Mum holds something up and my reaction is “what the hell?!” And trust me, she does it fairly regularly which is why I don’t let anything into her wardrobe without my approval.  The last time she managed it, a belt with a buckle that wouldn’t have been out of place on Dallas appeared… Never again!

One of the first times we went shopping she held something up and my response was along the lines of “if you buy that, I will find it and I will burn it” and that has become my catchphrase when we are out shopping.  Anyone who happened to walk by would think I was a wannabe arsonist but the irony is I’m actually terrified by fire… Maybe the shredder would work instead!

But the thing I have started to notice is that whilst I can appreciate fashion in many forms, even things which I would never wear in a million years, there are things which should never have even been contemplated as they are so hideous that even my cats would refuse to sleep on them.

I spotted the classic example at the top of this post on net a porter the other day of a dress that would benefit from the search and destroy tactic.  It is truely hideous, totally shapeless and in a pattern that wouldn’t have been out of place on a pair of curtains in the Sixties or Seventies.

I mean seriously, would any of you really wear this monstrosity?

It looks like the sort of thing that I would have made at school in my textiles classes and an expert sewer I was most definitely not.  And to add insult to injury, the price of this “dress” is £865. Seriously I could make this myself and they want £865 for it? Get a grip.

What have you seen recently which should be treated to the search and destroy treatment and condemned to the next bonfire?

Average Josephine x

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